Ebola Phone Thief

A thief nicked a cell phone from a patient at Kagadi Hospital in Kibaale District, Uganda. Turns out, the owner had Ebola and the thief became infected. From The Monitor:

Police detectives began tracking him after he apparently began communicating to his friends using the phone. But as police zeroed in on him, he developed symptoms similar to those of Ebola and sought medication at the hospital. 

While at hospital he reportedly confessed stealing the phone and has handed it to Kagadi police.

“Kagadi Police Station received that complaint and investigations are underway,” Mr John Ojokuna Elatu, the district police commander confirmed to Sunday Monitor.

Thief infected with Ebola from stolen phone - Boing Boing

She totally set herself up for that one.

---

Original Page: http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/9gag/~3/4wpH8ymzY_w/5166756

Man stopped at customs for carrying hundreds of dead black caterpillars eats his way through them

A man left airport border guards stunned when he munched his way through hundreds of dead caterpillars which had been discovered in a secret compartment in his suitcase.

I'm thinking that they had lost much of their nutritional value at this point...

---

Original Page: http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2193474/EuroAirport-Man-stopped-customs-carrying-hundreds-dead-black-caterpillars-eats-way-them.html?ITO=1490

No Babies

        

See full post and comment: http://9gag.com/gag/5164070

I Got That Beach Some Water. Beaches Love Water.

            

---

Original Page: http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/Failbooking/~3/ZCzZsD3vR6k/6526156544

Ew

---

Original Page: http://www.reddit.com/r/WTF/comments/yr67r/ew/

Helen Keller on Facebook

---

Original Page: http://whattheywouldsay.com/helenkellerfacebook

I don’t even know what’s right anymore

---

Original Page: http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/feedburner/ZdSV/~3/BxxozPEQYfg/

Everyone Is Always Naked

Congrats, pervs. The Parents Television Council released its annual report on TV nudity earlier this week, and it looks like you smut soldiers are winning the war. More » 

Sra. Cecilia's Fan Club

Joing the Facebook group Club de Fans de Cecilia: La Restauradora del Cristo de Borja

---

Original Page: http://wtfarthistory.com/post/30070533517

Staring at the Sun

Staring at the Sun, or something like that...

Nerds are not easily distracted by girls. 

---

Original Page: http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/thisisnthappiness/~3/7GknO90COPM/30076379677

Daily Morning Awesomeness

---

Original Page: http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/feedburner/ZdSV/~3/drFcKs1WRpQ/

Your Next Printer May be a MeatJet

The Thiel Foundation has made a six-figure grant to a series of biotechnology startups, including a company that wants to 3-D-print meat.

Modern Meadow is a Missouri-based startup that believes 3-D printing could help to take some of the environmental cost out of producing a hamburger. He said: “If you look at the resource intensity of everything that goes into a hamburger, it is an environmental train wreck.”

You had me at Missouri...

The company claims that by carefully layering mixtures of cells of different types in a specific structure, in-vitro meat production becomes feasible. It’s set a short-term goal of printing a sliver of meat around two centimeters by one centimeter, and less than half a millimeter thick, which is edible.

The company explains in a submission to the United States Department of Agriculture: “The technology has several advantages in comparison to earlier attempts to engineer meat in vitro. The bio-ink particles can be reproducibly prepared with mixtures of cells of different type. Printing ensures consistent shape, while post-printing structure formation and maturation in the bioreactor facilitates conditioning.”

However, it admits that the road ahead is strewn with difficulties. “The consumer acceptance of such products may not be without challenges. We expect it will first appeal to culinary early-adopter consumers and the segment of the vegetarian community that rejects meat for ethical reasons. With reduction in price, it can reach the masses with religious restrictions on meat consumption (people restricted to Hindu, Kosher, Halal diets) and finally populations with limited access to safe meat production.”

To help the company achieve this aim, Billionaire Peter Thiel has given it a grant of between £160,000 and £220,000, through the Thiel Foundation’s “Breakout Labs”. Other recipients of grants include Bell Biosystems and Entopsis, both medical startups.

PayPal Founder Backs Synthetic Meat Printing Company | Wired Science | Wired.com

Woman super-glued to Walmart toilet seat

A woman at a Kentucky Walmart got into a sticky situation this week when she sat on a toilet seat covered in super glue.

The unidentified woman was using the restroom at the Monticello, Ky., store, when she found that she was glued to the seat and couldn't get up, NBC affiliate LEX 18 reported. She was trapped on the toilet for at least an hour, according to the television station.

Police are investigating the incident.

"We're looking at it. Right now, I wouldn't be prepared to say which way it was - accident or intention," Monticello Police Department Chief Ralph Miniard told WAVE News.

Paramedics managed to pull the woman off the seat and took her to the hospital for examination.

APRIL FOOLS' JOKER LEAVES MAN GLUED TO WALMART TOILET; COPS MEDICS PULL MAN OFF JOHN, SEAT AND ALL

This isn't the first time someone has been glued to a toilet seat at a Walmart. In March 2011, a 48-year-old man in Elkton, Md., fell victim to an apparent April Fool's prank when he sat on a toilet seat that had been covered in glue, CNN reported.

If the prankster had been caught in that case, he or she could have faced second-degree assault charges, police told CNN.

Woman super-glued to Walmart toilet seat - New York Daily News

Man Bites Police Dog's Ear

A police dog serving with a North Carolina police department had its ear bitten by a suspect when officers were serving a warrant, authorities said.

Maxx, 2, the rookie K-9 worth about $15,000 and considered a law enforcement agent under state law, had to be rushed to a veterinarian’s office Sunday and given more than a dozen stitches after a run in with a man who nearly bit the dog's ear in two, Lucy Crockett, the public information officer for the Wilmington Police Department, said.

"He’s a terrific dog," Crockett said. "And he was undaunted, even though he was being bitten, he did not let the suspect go."

Maybe Glaspie should have bitten the cop instead...

Crockett said Maxx’s inexperience may have shown during the alleged assault. Even though he did not let up on the suspect, she said he probably didn’t return the level of force a more seasoned dog would have applied given the circumstances.

Police identified the suspect as Travis Glaspie, 22, who granted WECT.com a jailhouse interview.

"I ain’t never been bit by a dog or nothing, so I bit the dog on the ear," Glaspie said. Glaspie went on to say he believed he was mishandled by police during the arrest. He said a police officer punched him in the face and the dog was told “good boy” while he was biting the suspect.

[...]

Read more: A man bites dog story: Suspect chomped K-9's ear, police say | Fox News

Man Plagued by Porn-Induced Headaches

 

A man plagued by porn-induced headaches has to take painkillers 30 minutes before watching the X-rated movies, according to a case study. a The unnamed "unmarried male software professional," 24, complained of "severe, exploding" headaches that developed gradually and peaked 10 minutes into the sexy scenes.

"Doctor, doctor. It hurts when I do this."

"Progressively, he started to refrain from viewing videos as a means of avoiding headaches," researchers from Guru Gobind Singh Indraprastha University in New Delhi, India, wrote in the case study published in the June issue of Archives of Sexual Behavior.

Sounds like the sensible thing to do...

The cause of the man's ill-timed headaches, triggered only by porn and not by sex or masturbation, is unclear.

"This guy is interesting because he's just watching porn and not actually having sex," said Dawn Buse, associate professor of neurology at Albert Einstein College of Medicine and director of behavioral medicine at the Montefiore Headache Center in New York. "But he probably still gets aroused and excited, which may be even worse than having sex because there's no release."

Buse said about 1 percent of the population -- mostly males -- get headaches associated with sexual activity. But even arousal can cause changes in muscle tension, nerve sensitivity and blood flow in the brain that boost the perception of pain, she said.

[...]

Man Plagued by Porn-Induced Headaches | firstcoastnews.com

Man threatens neighbor with gun for flatulence

Odor in the court.

A 72-year-old New Jersey man has been charged with threatening to shoot his neighbor for farting in front of his home.

Instead of waving off Monday night’s flatulence attack, Daniel Collins of Teaneck pulled a .32-caliber revolver and threatened to “put a hole” in his gassy neighbor’s head, cops said.

The stink apparently stemmed from an ongoing dispute between the two men over noise, police told The Record of North Jersey.

Collins told cops his 47-year-old neighbor cut the cheese so loudly in his vestibule he heard it inside his apartment before he smelled it.

Collins was charged with aggravated assault, unlawful possession of a firearm and making terroristic threats. He was released without bail.

Man threatens neighbor with gun for flatulence - New York Daily News

Shark Attack III

---

Original Page: http://www.collegehumor.com/article/6251587/shark-attack-iii

Today's Learning: Motorboating Olympics

Today's Learning: Did you know that motor boating was an Olympic event in 1908?

I'd easily earn gold if it were still included today.

Sadly, it was a one-time event...

Slut Shaming Women

It's no secret that I am not a fan of Sarah Palin. Most of the time when she opens up her mouth, I cringe. I don't like her politics. I think she is a hypocrite as well, and I don't feel she is an honest person. I think she should just step down and go about her life.

But, I have to say I was shocked, saddened and very angry over many of the comments that I saw pertaining to the posted photo.

Palin is wearing a a Superman T-shirt, a pair of black capri pants and some high heels.

She looks good. She's a middle aged woman and she obviously takes care of herself. More power to her.

I couldn't walk in those shoes, but I think she is rocking them out. And I personally love the T-shirt. I want one!

The remarks that I saw all over the Internet about this particular picture, well..shocked me.

Let me repeat. I am NOT a fan of Palin, but when I saw the picture, I pretty much just kept on going. I didn't have an opinion on it and I didn't see what other people saw. I really had no clue why that picture was showing up all over the Internet, until I saw some actual posts about it.

I saw several references to her picture calling her a "whore, slut, trailer trash." I saw comments about her breasts being fake and her shoes being called, "come fuck me shoes."

One man said, "She looks like a trailer park whore.. sorry,,"

(You're not sorry. You're ignorant.)

Another said, " She just needs a wild liberal 'Superman', with a big gun, to show her some tuff love… anybody know one…?"

(Yeah, just what every woman needs. Fuck her good. Teach her something.)

I am convinced that people say things like this to dehumanize a person.

Strip them down to nothing. And for women, it is even worse. Why is this okay?

---

Full article: http://www.worldwidehippies.com/2012/08/09/slut-shaming-women/

How to Avoid Social Interaction

Talking with strangers on the bus is a great way to learn about the world, but some days you just want to shut yourself off. For those types of days, ... read more

Or just stay home...

Taxing Customers

Me: "Hello, how are you, sir?"

Customer: "Just this." *places a magazine on the counter*

Me: "That will be $2.20, please."

Customer: "There's tax!"

Me: "Yes, sir. Magazines are taxed."

Customer: "To h*** with that! I ain't payin' no tax!" *stomps off*

Next Customer: *to the first customer* "Well, aren't you a special snowflake?"

If more folks would come to that conclusion, we might be able to get back to a free market system without an interventionistic government stealing from us through taxation. 

Related:
Taxing Customers